“So what is your resolution for 2012?” I asked a friend over the holidays.
“Resolutions??!! I don’t do resolutions, they are so cliché. People make their resolutions in January, break their resolutions by February and then spend the next 11 months feeling guilty about them until it is time to disappoint themselves again the following year.”
Although I was initially taken aback by the cynicism of the comment (and possibly a little offended that she was basically calling me cliché for making a resolution), what she said had merit.
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As always, IHHP continues to be involved with charity events and organizations in our communities to help those struggling to “be their best when it matters most”. The overwhelming joy and pride we take in helping others outside of work is something IHHP has been doing for years and we wanted to update our valued community some of these activities.
• In 2010 and 2011, IHHP has been one of the main sponsors for the Lake Simcoe Tour which helps support the local food banks in efforts to reduce those in need.
• The 2011 Dragon Boat Festival in Barrie, Ontario, Canada saw the emergence of the team “Its Been Emotional” who took the award home for “Rookie Of The Year”. That was us!
• Since joining Kiva in 2008, IHHP has participated in the raising of funds for over 90 different individuals, organizations and businesses in third world countries For those unaware of how Kiva works, it is a non-profit organization with a mission to connect people through lending to alleviate poverty. Using the internet and a worldwide network of microfinance institutions.
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The holiday season is upon us, and depending on the lens with which you’re viewing this season, you may be excited and happy about that or overwhelmed and distraught. That’s why our team here at IHHP decided to focus on ‘gratitude’ as our theme for our December newsletter. Science and research continues to show that when you come from a place of gratitude, not only do you improve your own health and happiness, but you also positively affect relationships with those around you. In fact, during this season, we encourage you to focus on having two to three grateful thoughts a day. And while you do this, take notice of the change in your whole body from the physical sensation to the outlook you have in the moment. (Think of the Grinch when “his heart grew three sizes that day.” Made you smile, didn’t it?)
It’s actually pretty easy (and fun) to start a gratitude wave in your office or home. Here’s one IHHP tried for the holiday season that initially felt “hokey” but turned out to be a wonderful sharing experience between co-workers. And it didn’t cost anything. We simply asked people to share their favorite holiday song with us and tell us why that was their favorite. Here are some of the things we learned about each other:
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The team at IHHP is so very grateful for our amazing community. For you! We often don’t realize how wonderful a community we have until we have to ask them for guidance.
In November 2011, we reached out to our community to ask you for input into helping us plan our future here at IHHP. With everyone being so time-starved these days we weren’t sure if we would get enough feedback to really give our community a voice as we headed into our 2012 plan. So our team thought it would be good to at least offer a small contest to incent people to participate. (Reminder: We offered a draw for an iPod Nano for everyone who participated.)
Not only did we have a huge response (way bigger than even the most optimistic amongst us thought we’d get!), but we had a lot of our community tell us they were actually disappointed that we felt we had to offer a contest to do so. In fact, some told me that they felt it was a “marketing gimmick” and just another way to get your e-mail addresses on our list. So they avoided responding. Thankfully, you were willing to tell me this!
Don’t worry. We honored the contest for those of you who did respond. In fact, our winner is…. Willia Cooper from Staples, Inc. in Framingham, MA.
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When I was a child, every Christmas my parents would pack us into the car to visit my grandmother. On the way to her home, my father would say to us, “I need you kids to listen to me for a few minutes.” Once Marty and I stopped singing and Mike stopped punching Len in the arm, he would deliver his annual directive to us.
“Whatever gift Grandma gives you, just say thank you,” he would remind us. “Don’t say she gave you the same thing last year, don’t say you hate that colour, don’t say you like your sister’s gift better. Just say thank you.”
We children, being the clever (or smart-mouthed, depending on your perspective) little individuals we were, would challenge him, “What if she gives us the same thing we got at home this morning?”
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Take a holiday shopping day, impatient people, bad weather, too-small and too-few parking spaces, and add on top of that the best box office sales of the year and you have all of the ingredients of a recipe for disaster. They call it “Black Friday”. A day, and a shopping trip, I will never forget…
It was November 26th, 2010 when my friend, Lisa, and I set out to do some serious holiday shopping. After Lisa and I had been sitting in the car for over 15 minutes just trying to turn into the parking lot, much of our initial excitement was losing steam. Once in, we realized that it was time to be strategic if we were going to get a parking spot. We aligned ourselves to execute the “Stalk and Block”; a parking method used by truly serious holiday shoppers like us where exiting shoppers are stalked to their car then blocked until they pull their car out. At which point the Stalk and Blocker takes over the well-earned spot.
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The US Thanksgiving weekend is one of the busiest holidays of the year as people visit with family and friends and, of course, who can ignore the amazing sales. Even Canadians get in on the action as they cross the border in search of exceptional shopping deals on Black Friday. In 2010 as many as 212 million shoppers visited stores and spent an average of $365.34 per person according to the National Retail Federation. With so many people jockeying for parking spots, elbowing for Elmo dolls, and standing in lines for iPads, there are many things that could trigger someone to become emotionally hijacked. That’s why we have decided to put together an Emotional Intelligence Survival Guide for Black Friday.
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This is a story about Fred. Fred manages a very busy full-service hardware store that’s part of a huge national chain. His store is immaculate, his inventory spot on and his ability to predict what his customers want is legendary. But something’s not quite right in Fred’s store.
Fred’s supervisors really want to love him, but they just can’t because Fred’s store sales are consistently below average, despite the size of the store and the high amount of traffic his store experiences.
On the surface, Fred’s a good guy. He’s friendly with all of his staff. He’s really good with customers and is by far the best salesperson in the store … potentially even within the entire chain. In a large store like his, however, it takes more than one person to drive overall store numbers; Fred’s team needs to produce as well. But they don’t, and the sales results continue to be a disappointment to the company.
You see, Fred is a scaredy cat. What, you may ask, is Fred so scared of?
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The IHHP research team, headed up by our very own Dr. JP Pawliw-Fry, has been working on several studies over the past number of years that explore how individuals (specifically leaders) approach and/or avoid difficult tasks, relationships or change and the effect this has on the individual, as well as the people and teams around them.
The results of these studies, thanks to many of you who participated and/or cheered us on throughout the years, is the basis for several workshops that we are launching this year, along with future books and resources.
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Emotional Intelligence has many applications, one of the most helpful being in the area of having important conversations that address overt, covert or impending conflict. Conflict itself is not inherently positive or negative but rather it’s how we respond that tends to shape the experience in either direction. As such, E.I. skills can greatly increase the odds of conflict being positive or useful as a client of mine recently discovered during our E.I. Coaching session.
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